so i miss all my friends a ton but the one i miss the most is my gay best friend. Alex seidel. he and i are like twin bros. we really do share a mind sometimes its hilarious adn when we are together we laugh adn make those around us laugh till they cry. hes at college now and i dont get random texts as much or even randomer calls. Its gotten really quiet without him. Its weird. Like a person from new york moving to kansas and misses the traffic well im the new yorker and hes my traffic. I saw him friday night and hadnt realized how much i missed him till then. hes grown up a lot but hes still him. it felt like forever since i saw him. it had only been a day and a half since i talked to him oh mer.
The song that this title is for is by dashboard confessional. no i dont rember the name and no i wont look it up in my ipod. its off there new cd. If ya wanna know look it up. i m tired night
Love,
More than my own life
Wha-Wha
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
To sir with love
I finally got my friends poem done. i think this is where i want it to be... theres a hidden message in it. find it and the poem is even more powerful...
My Brother From A Second Mother
I don’t know why it happened,
Listening to each other and laughing we became friends.
Often enough, friendships like ours don’t happen.
Very lucky are we, who become like brothers,
Especially when you show as much love to each other as we do.
You were always there for me, just as I was for you.
Only now we must say our goodbyes.
Used to be we were never apart for long.
Many roads are ahead of us,
Always will you be in my heart,
No matter what happens you will always be my best man.
hope you like it. ill post it on fb tomorrow when i get home from breakfast.
Love,
More than my own life
Wha-Wha
Monday, August 16, 2010
To Sir with Love
Nothing much to say. it was an amazing last night with one of my best buddies. SEidel dripps and i got together to say goodbye to dripps. We had a blast all night up until we said the final goodbye and we started to cry. I was fine for a little bit but i was gone when i heard our senior song. Dripps and i love that song and were exstatic when it was picked. Seidel called us the three musketeers of mayhem. We really are that. We are loud and love to laugh and joke and of anybody i think im gonna miss them the most. Im gonna go cry some more now. ttyl
Love,
more than my own life
Wha-Wha
Love,
more than my own life
Wha-Wha
So live like you mean it, Love till you feel it
Hey,
So i know i told you id post my friends poem as the next post but im not happy with it yet. Idk. the feeling just isnt right from it. Hopefully it gets better. He was like my brother adn i really did love him and i want that to get across in the poem. Right now its just a friendship. i think im just gonna trash this one and start all over. In total, this will make three letters and two poems to him if i start over. Good things happen in fives adn threes so hopefully this gets the right meaning across. I hope it does. I have to say goodbye to a good friend tonight. So ill prolly post again later tonight. maybe a poem will come.
Love,
More than my own life
WHa-Wha
So i know i told you id post my friends poem as the next post but im not happy with it yet. Idk. the feeling just isnt right from it. Hopefully it gets better. He was like my brother adn i really did love him and i want that to get across in the poem. Right now its just a friendship. i think im just gonna trash this one and start all over. In total, this will make three letters and two poems to him if i start over. Good things happen in fives adn threes so hopefully this gets the right meaning across. I hope it does. I have to say goodbye to a good friend tonight. So ill prolly post again later tonight. maybe a poem will come.
Love,
More than my own life
WHa-Wha
Sunday, August 15, 2010
People come into our lives for a reason
So as summer comes to an end an overwhelming feeling has come over me. and that is the feeling of goodbye. Us ually its not a big deal. I am used to just going to see friends and saying by to summer and then the next day we all be at school together talking like we never had to say goodbye. The thing is is when we say goodbye this time. i wont see everyone the nexxt day. When we say goodbye, its goodbye until probably thanksgiving. I wont be able to go out with these people every weekend. Its kind of sad but usually i get to say goodbye to eveyone before they leave and i can write them a poem and give it to them. Well, last night that didnt really happen so i was extremely sad. I didnt want to post the poem before saying goodbye to a certain someone and giving them the poem first. They failed to show up last night and didnt even bother to send a goodbye text or call or fb message. i was sad. i will post the poem for him here first before i do it on fb but i dont know when i will post it. im still kinda sad.
The song that the title comes from is another one of my favorite songs, For Good, its from the musical Wicked. it also is the song that my senior class sang at our senior follies, which is a big comedy thing seniors do. I was the one who picked the song out. it talks about friends and love and how even though we dont know why people come into our lives to make a difference and that may not always be known to us. It also says that even if we never see each other again we will always love and care about the people who we call our friends and love. It means a lot to me because all of my friends are like this.
Love,
More than my own life
Wha-Wha
The song that the title comes from is another one of my favorite songs, For Good, its from the musical Wicked. it also is the song that my senior class sang at our senior follies, which is a big comedy thing seniors do. I was the one who picked the song out. it talks about friends and love and how even though we dont know why people come into our lives to make a difference and that may not always be known to us. It also says that even if we never see each other again we will always love and care about the people who we call our friends and love. It means a lot to me because all of my friends are like this.
Love,
More than my own life
Wha-Wha
Saturday, August 14, 2010
I wanna save you
So im changing the way this blog is going and making it focus on things i observe in others and in general. its also where i can post more of my writing and such. So here's to new beginnings.
So this summer has been an absolute a lot of ups and downs adn twist but fun the whole way until the very end. Between losing weight and enjoying food and gaining and losing friends its been the most amazing summer of my life. I think that most of all ive grown into something more than i was before. something similar but also older. i guess what im saying is that i used to be kind of naive about the true nature of some hearts. I am a huge believer in the powers of light over darkness and the constant struggle between them. Also the effects they have on the hearts of the people of the world. I dont mean the physical heart or mind but that heart where we feel love and safety and the mind where we have our inner eye, imagination, and the all important inner voice that we all consult when we are in different situations. Over the years ive been able to find the light in people and naturally i get attacted to it and i befriend those with light. And the people that whether they actually have darkness in them or feel like they deserve to belong to darkness are who i help.
I guess since i havent said in this blog. but i am the secret keeper and psychiatrist of the group. I hear all problems and concerns. The thing is is i love to hear all of those things. its so refreshing to see so much trust taht a friend will give to someone else. The thing is is that for a while i was getting over loaded and i couldnt handle things for awhile. Every story was getting mixed up and i would constantly worry about all my friends. im sure for awhile they were all annoyed by me constantly questioning them.
Sorry that was a tangent from where i was.... So anywho. What i do is read peoples emotions which leads to understanding where their minds are going and what they are thinking. No i cant read minds but i make guesses as to what people are thinking based on the emotions they are putting out. So for example: Funerals are the death of me. I guess wakes are up there too with funerals. I just needed to clarify. So the reason they are so bad ill start with wakes. If you think in a dead body at a wake. there is nothing light nor dark just nothing. So its like a vacuum of nothingness that sucks to be around. So it jus makes you depressd. And the thing with funerals is that there is no good emotions everything is sad and crying. So i could not even know the person and be sobbing. Its happened many times and it actually almost as much if i knew the person all my life. Its also painful to see my friends cry.
Example to that last sentence. on my last musical at my school we do this thing called the senior send off. where the whole cast jjoins hands around the theatre with all the seniors on stage. they then read off all the seniors names. Its very emotional cause the way my school worked was whatever you did you made friends and they became your family so this was mid febuary and i was already saying goodbye to some friends because we wouldnt have the experience of this musical together ever again. So we were all hugging cause we had all grown to be an awesome family even the girls from the girl schoool since my school is all guys. So i turned to one of my best friends who worked crew while i was a dancer adn an actor i also worked crew adn he hadnt been cry adn he looked at me and started to. He came up to me and hugged me and whispered that he wasnt going to do crew for the next show. The sad part about that was that i had told him the night before when i slept at his house was that i was looking forward to working crew with him. So then we both started to sob. literally nobody could get us to move. we delayed the show starting by 20 min cause we didnt move from the stage. THe thing is is we both kept crying off stage. He could stay back stage i couldnt. i was a principle in the show so i had to be on stage with a body mic and be able to sing my harmonies. It was the hardest thing ever. I wuold get off stage adn he would be there waiting and we would just break down.
So ya Emotions rock for me. i love them even when i hate them.
Love,
More than my own life
Wha-Wha
So this summer has been an absolute a lot of ups and downs adn twist but fun the whole way until the very end. Between losing weight and enjoying food and gaining and losing friends its been the most amazing summer of my life. I think that most of all ive grown into something more than i was before. something similar but also older. i guess what im saying is that i used to be kind of naive about the true nature of some hearts. I am a huge believer in the powers of light over darkness and the constant struggle between them. Also the effects they have on the hearts of the people of the world. I dont mean the physical heart or mind but that heart where we feel love and safety and the mind where we have our inner eye, imagination, and the all important inner voice that we all consult when we are in different situations. Over the years ive been able to find the light in people and naturally i get attacted to it and i befriend those with light. And the people that whether they actually have darkness in them or feel like they deserve to belong to darkness are who i help.
I guess since i havent said in this blog. but i am the secret keeper and psychiatrist of the group. I hear all problems and concerns. The thing is is i love to hear all of those things. its so refreshing to see so much trust taht a friend will give to someone else. The thing is is that for a while i was getting over loaded and i couldnt handle things for awhile. Every story was getting mixed up and i would constantly worry about all my friends. im sure for awhile they were all annoyed by me constantly questioning them.
Sorry that was a tangent from where i was.... So anywho. What i do is read peoples emotions which leads to understanding where their minds are going and what they are thinking. No i cant read minds but i make guesses as to what people are thinking based on the emotions they are putting out. So for example: Funerals are the death of me. I guess wakes are up there too with funerals. I just needed to clarify. So the reason they are so bad ill start with wakes. If you think in a dead body at a wake. there is nothing light nor dark just nothing. So its like a vacuum of nothingness that sucks to be around. So it jus makes you depressd. And the thing with funerals is that there is no good emotions everything is sad and crying. So i could not even know the person and be sobbing. Its happened many times and it actually almost as much if i knew the person all my life. Its also painful to see my friends cry.
Example to that last sentence. on my last musical at my school we do this thing called the senior send off. where the whole cast jjoins hands around the theatre with all the seniors on stage. they then read off all the seniors names. Its very emotional cause the way my school worked was whatever you did you made friends and they became your family so this was mid febuary and i was already saying goodbye to some friends because we wouldnt have the experience of this musical together ever again. So we were all hugging cause we had all grown to be an awesome family even the girls from the girl schoool since my school is all guys. So i turned to one of my best friends who worked crew while i was a dancer adn an actor i also worked crew adn he hadnt been cry adn he looked at me and started to. He came up to me and hugged me and whispered that he wasnt going to do crew for the next show. The sad part about that was that i had told him the night before when i slept at his house was that i was looking forward to working crew with him. So then we both started to sob. literally nobody could get us to move. we delayed the show starting by 20 min cause we didnt move from the stage. THe thing is is we both kept crying off stage. He could stay back stage i couldnt. i was a principle in the show so i had to be on stage with a body mic and be able to sing my harmonies. It was the hardest thing ever. I wuold get off stage adn he would be there waiting and we would just break down.
So ya Emotions rock for me. i love them even when i hate them.
Love,
More than my own life
Wha-Wha
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Tribute
So tonight was absolutely epicness. We went over to mikey's and had an awesome night. it was a great night without any drama or any problems just good friends and good times. we all got along and had an amazing time. we had a great guest of kate buckley. she was so much fun and just melded in with us and hopefully felt welcome. She taught us an awesome game called ninja. so much fun. me and gable won a lot of the games.
When everyone else had left, and the only people who remained were mikey gable tyty and me. we started ot make some spoofs of songs. i cant really share them here cause they were slightly inappropriate but so hilarious. It was great to be wtih everyone and still just the guys being together and we were so happy.
Its nights like these that im gonna miss the most. We all know that we will always be friends its just even further in the future we dont want to be completely separated from each otehr. Our hearts are connected and nothing can stop us from seeing each other. We may not be able to be together all the time but the love we have for each other will be able to transcend all time and we will never forget each other.
Love,
more than my own life
Wha-Wha
When everyone else had left, and the only people who remained were mikey gable tyty and me. we started ot make some spoofs of songs. i cant really share them here cause they were slightly inappropriate but so hilarious. It was great to be wtih everyone and still just the guys being together and we were so happy.
Its nights like these that im gonna miss the most. We all know that we will always be friends its just even further in the future we dont want to be completely separated from each otehr. Our hearts are connected and nothing can stop us from seeing each other. We may not be able to be together all the time but the love we have for each other will be able to transcend all time and we will never forget each other.
Love,
more than my own life
Wha-Wha
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